I have a confession to make, I am a recovering introvert. Yes, it’s true! Some folks have a hard time believing this because I am a public speaker, coach, mentor, and even did a little acting in LA at a one time in my life. But I wasn’t always the confident, dynamic speaker and businesswoman that I am today. I’m sharing my story with you so you will see that hard work, practice, training, and desire to grow will create a personal transformation for anyone, but especially for introverts like me.
For many years, my mantra has been “Fake it ‘til you make it”. And you know, before too long I MADE IT! Consider the following advice from this recovering introvert:
1. Be Confident
Look people directly in the eye.
A trick I’ve used to this day is that as I talk to someone I focus on their eye color. This technique gives me something to remember about the person as I walk away, and it means that I’ve made a real connection.
Listen to others and be present.
Be the person in the room who approaches the introvert in the corner. You know the one I’m talking about, she’s using her cell phone as a distraction to avoid talking to people. I know this is easier said than done, but there is a way to do it. Check out my future videos and blogs for the juicy details.
When you walk in a room, SMILE!
I think many of us are unaware of the way we look when we are not “present” when walking into a room, event, party, or restaurant. This means we aren’t engaging people with our expression and our eyes. We give the vibe that we would rather be somewhere else. When I walk into a room, I want people to think “she’s fun, she’s approachable, and she loves life!”
Give and receive compliments.
During conversation, always compliment a personal characteristic, an achievement, or something the person is wearing. Who doesn’t like getting a compliment? When someone gives you a compliment, be sure to say “thank you!” Most of us tend to downplay receiving compliments by taking the focus off ourselves. Ladies, learn how to take a compliment! It’s as simple as saying two words—“THANK-YOU!” Use them with practice and repetition, and before you know it saying the words will feel natural. Saying “thank-you” means you are acknowledging that other people find you interesting.
2. Look the Part
Develop a style that expresses your personality. Style says a lot about your confidence. If you are a “jeans and t-shirt” girl, try something different to see how it feels. Add a little “bling” to make you shine! I love drama, but your style should be an extension of you. I often experiment with different looks. If you’re unsure about how an outfit looks or fits, wear it to run errands to determine your confidence level while you’re in it.
3. Use Affirmations on a Daily Basis
To instill this habit, write a note on your bathroom mirror that says, for example, “I am strong, competent, and beautiful!” When you see that note, you will remember that confidence is a daily discipline.
4. Find a Role Model
Do what they do. Ask them questions. Get them to mentor you. If you see someone who has it “going on,” learn from them. Most people want to help and asking them for advice is a form of flattery.
5. Connect With Others.
Surround yourself with like-minded people. Keeping company with other strong professionals increases your professional credibility. When you are able, be a connector. Give referrals, support others who are finding success, and show up to things. Resist the temptation to relax on the couch. People will remember that you supported them.
On a personal note:
You might be reading this and thinking “it cannot happen for me!” I have been where you are, and I assure you that if I can do it, so can you!
I am Heidi Parr Kerner and I have a passion for helping people be the best version of themselves! Be the authentic “you” that is craving to be reborn and transformed!
Contact me today for more information on how I can help to create, transform, and guide you to your destiny.